Plans

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

I have so much updating to do with pictures and such...but, that will have to wait for another day. I didn't want to put this off. As most of you probably know, we've been waiting for answers about what God has in store for us. Paul was laid off in February and since then has been working HARD to find a job. Some of what seemed to be the most "perfect" jobs for him came and went and we couldn't figure out why. If you know my hubby, you know he's very employable. He's educated, smart, has lots of experience in his field, and he's good to look at too! Sometimes finding out "why" is not part of the God's plan. The person we go to so much for advice (my Dad) suggested that we start thinking outside of the box. What could we be doing differently? What if I started looking for a teaching job? My first reaction was sadness. What if I did that and God answered by giving ME a job. I'm a stay-at-home Mommy. In my head, that meant I'm not suppose to go back to work until all of my girls were in school. It's what I'd always wanted and planned for. We've quickly learned that our plans are not God's plans. After we prayed about it, I decided that it wouldn't hurt anything to fill out applications and contact people that I knew when I taught. After a couple of days I felt a peace that I don't understand about the possibility of going back to work. I made phone calls, wrote e-mails, and prayed a lot. Without going into lots of detail (this post could turn into a book) I had an interview for a 4th grade position one week and an interview for a 1st grade position the next. I was just thrilled to have interviews. Throughout all of this, I still felt a peace. Being at home with my girls has been the best job that I've ever had. But, if I can't do that, there is nothing I would rather do than teach. I love teaching. This week has become the week of answers. I feel incredibly blessed. God has said "no" and closed so many doors over the past several months. This week he opened two doors for me and I was so thankful to be able to choose which one to walk through. I only say this to emphasize just how amazing and faithful God is. He said "no" to us so many times and then gave me a choice of which "yes" I wanted to take. (I hope this makes sense...if not, I'll explain in person.) Not only did he say "yes" to a job for me, but he said "yes" to Paul going back to school. He was officially notified that he's been accepted into the grad program he'd applied for. We are anxious and really excited to see where all of this leads us.

Even though God has given me a peace about not being able to stay home with my girls, I've had my days when I've struggled with it. I'm not ashamed to admit that I'll probably cry the first day that I leave them to work for the first time since any of them have been born. It'll happen. I guarantee it. :) Even so, God has been faithful. He's allowing me to go back to do something that I love and he's reminded me how being a Mommy can affect my profession. A few weeks ago at church, they played this video. The story behind it is amazing, but there was one line that Pam Cope says that made the flood gates open. She says, "I now understand that being a Mother means that we make ourselves available to other children." That's how I'm going to go into this. I'm going to look at the kids in my classroom through new eyes. When I taught before, I wasn't a Mom. I'm not saying that you can't be a wonderful teacher if you're not a Mommy, but I know that I will be a different teacher this time around. I will be a better teacher because I'm a Mommy. (Meaning better than I was...not better than anyone else. Just so no one will misinterpret. :)) I want my girls to someday know that they helped me become better. And they have. I can't even explain with words the love that explodes from my heart for them. My cup runneth over.