Trials

I've been having a hard time with Paul's job loss. The weirdo downstairs keeps hitting me with lots of things. I've dealt with anger, doubt, and more anger. It's hard to admit and it's so tempting just to keep writing sweet posts of how trusting I am, but the truth is I'm struggling. But...I AM so thankful that I serve a Lord who will carry us through anyway. He is still in control and is completely faithful. He continues to show us that through this trial (which I know seems so menial compared to what others are going through right now) that He loves us and has not forgotten us.

"I will not forget you. I have written your name on the palms of my hands. Your walls are never out of my sight." Isaiah 49:15-16

This morning was one of those mornings that I was struggling. My sweet husband shared with me some scripture that I really needed. Here it is. It's long, but so worth it.

My brothers and sisters, you will face all kinds of trouble. When you do, think of it as pure joy. Your faith will be put to the test. You know that when that happens it will produce in you the strength to continue. The strength to keep going must be allowed to finish its work. Then you will be all you should be. You will have everything you need. If any of you need wisdom, ask God for it. He will give it to you. God gives freely to everyone. He doesn't find fault. But when you ask, you must believe. You must not doubt. People who doubt are like waves of the sea. The wind blows and tosses them around. A man like that shouldn't expect to receive anything from the Lord. He can't make up his mind. He can never decide what to do. A believer who finds himself in a low position in life should be proud that God has given him a high position. But someone who is rich should take pride in his low position. That's because he will fade away like a wild flower. The sun rises. Its burning heat dries up the plants. Their blossoms fall. Their beauty is destroyed. In the same way, a rich person will fade away even as he goes about his business. Blessed is the man who keeps on going when times are hard. After he has come through them, he will receive a crown. The crown is life itself. God has promised it to those who love him.

My dear brothers and sisters, don't let anyone fool you. Every good and perfect gift is from God. It comes down from the Father. He created the heavenly lights. He does not change like shadows that move. God chose to give us new birth through the message of truth. He wanted us to be the first and best of everything he created.

My dear brothers and sisters, pay attention to what I say. Everyone should be quick to listen. But they should be slow to speak. They should be slow to get angry. A man's anger doesn't produce the kind of life God wants. So get rid of everything that is dirty and sinful. Get rid of the evil that is all around us. Don't be too proud to accept the word that is planted in you. It can save you. Don't just listen to the word. You fool yourselves if you do that. You must do what it says. Suppose you listen to the word but don't do what it says. Then you are like a man who looks at his face in a mirror. After looking at himself, he leaves. Right away he forgets what he looks like. But suppose you take a good look at the perfect law that gives freedom. You keep looking at it. You don't forget what you've heard, but you do what the law says. Then you will be blessed in what you do. Suppose you think your beliefs are right because of how you live. But you don't control what you say. Then you are fooling yourselves. Your beliefs are not worth anything at all. James 1:2-12; 16-27

I'm sure I'm not done feeling anger and doubt every now and then, but I'm so pumped to be reminded that He will give me and Paul the strength we need to continue. I don't want to be "blown and tossed away." I want my faith to grow deeper and stronger and be excited to see what our awesome Father has in store for us. Thanks to all of you who have prayed for us and continue to. Your faithful friendships are part of that strength that He has given us to continue.

FYI--We still haven't heard about the job that he interviewed twice for last week. We're hoping to hear something on Monday.